Friday, August 15, 2008

Feel Good Friday: Talk to the Animals!

Elephant Brand, mixed media on canvas
private collection, Iowa City

The maniacal, not-so-borderline nut case Crazy Cath of Crazy Cath's Reflections went on one of her award rampages. Seems she grabbed a slingshot (I mean blingshot), loaded it with first one award, then the other, and proceeded to shoot, willy-nilly, into the vastness of cyberspace. Lucky me, I got caught in the crossfire. This award that looks like an itty bitty TV struck me right in the crown chakra. Yes! Cath has honored me with the Must See Blog Award.

I haven't been the same since. Talk about the big head. Now I have the gift of tongues. I find myself fluent in baby dwagonese, bwogging cat lingo, gween wagonese, and Bob T. Bearalect. I beg of you. Do not envy me. It's a curse to be so talented.

You haven't really plumbed the depths of mental hell until you've began to think in dwagonese. You wook at a bwog and wead evuhwy r and evuhwy l wike a w. Itz scawy. Itz cweepy-cwawly. I am despewate. I am a wag. A wimp, wifewess, dishwag. In a moment of wunacy, I have decided to pass this Must See Bwog Awawd on to my bwogging animal fwiends. Maybe they will begin to talk wike human beings for a change:


OK. Duh winnuhs of the Must See Bwog Awawds (dwumwoll):

Awex duh Bwoggin' Cat of Alexicon: A Kitty Kat's Life with His Hooman. Spiritual nememis of wetired minister Sometimes Saintly Nick. Goes through all the jokes people send for Nick to put on his bwog Nick's Bytes, cweans 'em up wif his paws, and duh ones dat are too waunchy (wevolving awound duh theme of wawdwobe malfunction), he puts on Nick's othuh bwog, the UCC on the Net.

Bob T Bear, (esq) of Bob T Bear (esq.)'s Diary. A debonair British dude about town. Wooks kickarse in a red Pendleton coat. Filmmaker. Horticulturalist extraordinaire. (His secret's in his fertilizer.) Creative challenger. Statistician of the Daily Serprizity Score. Tabulator of the Gills/Simpsons/Tesco frequency. Lyric poet whose obsession is poo, which rhymes with loo. I told you he has a knack with fertilizer. Nemesis of:

Dilly, of Dilly's Castle, a bootiful gween wagon. Gwaceful. Pwetty in pink. Pwincessy. Pwissy. When Dilly picks up her awawd, I know the first show she will tune into on that pwetty wittle tv (except she calls it a tewwy). Miami CSI.

Dilly fancies wedheaded dudes. And dudes who can dwaw weally well.

And a dwagon who can dwaw weally well is Dilly's soul mate. Dat would be Chuck aka Meanie the Baby Dragon. Chuck dwew Dilly's potwait as a medieval dwagon-wady.

Is Chuck in wuv with Dilly? I hope so! Dwagon wuv is the tweetest. But I digwess. Chuck is getting the Must See Bwog Awawd for his timewy weporting on newsworthy events. Duh Enquiwing papawazzi know where to go for the weally big scoop.

And now you do too.


Akelamalu said...

Is that anything like Wurzeleze? :(

San said...

Well, Pearl, it's just about as challenging.


Alex the Blogging Kat said...

Oh, San, u sayz berry nice tingz bout me and my silly hoomin bean. Tank you berry berry much! I likez the award thingie and I putz on my bloggy thingie. OK?

San said...

Alex, u are such a kool kat. The award thingie will look fantastic on your bloggy thingie.

U are berry berry welcome.

A.Bananna said...

lol. you crack me up with all your ideas! you are such a neat person! I love that painting also! the colors!! wow!! have a great weekend.

My oldest fractured her arm AGAIN! it is the same as before. so...there goes all of our olympic dreams! LOL. no I am kidding. She was doing a cartwheel when she fractured it again. LOL

San said...

Anna, OUCH. My little grand-niece is a gymnast and last year she broke BOTH her wrists. In church, believe it or not.


Everything healed and she is active as ever. Best wishes to you and your lovely daughter...and thank you for your nice words about the painting.

B.T.Bear (esq.) said...

Oh my! Wat a accollayde! Wat a refrence! Wat a revew! Wat an award!!!! THANK YU so much!!!!


I agree abowt wagoneez tho.... silly green nonsense.

DILLY said...

HEWO SAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

THANK for givin Dilly ward!
San kno Dilly vewy well!
Dilly do luvvvvvv Rayshio on CSI.
But not hav to be redhed.
Sumtime be red hed.
Zarmpol, Dilly like Yul Bryner an Patwik Stewart.
Dilly think Yul Bryner in Magnifsent 2 be luvly luvly.
Dilly like Patwik Stewart on Star Trek, as be fwend ov Mr Worf, an Mr Worf be wagonny.

Oooo thank for intro to Alex Kat. Dilly go vestygayte...


San said...

Bob, you are richly deserving of this accolayde. Find a nice spot on Mummy's shelf to put your little telly.

You are welcome!

Mrs Mac said...

San, you've made my day. I was laughing out loud! Thanks for the lift! & for honouring Dilly and Bob!
LOL!!!!!!!!! This is so funny!

San said...

Wow Dilly, I didn't know about these other crushes. Yul Bryner an Patwik Stewart are certainly worthy of admiration at that. And I see what you mean about Worf's wagoniness. Kind of like 2, make that 3, degrees of separation.


San said...

Well, Helena, now you've made MY day! Wish your visits here were more frequent.

Not that I don't LOVE it when you send Bob and Dilly over to play.

Chuck fka: Meanie said...

Dank u doh much San mee Mawmawz fwend! Mee wuv dittin doz uhwadz!

U peek vewee vewee dood dwaguneez an tink u duh bezt!

Mee mawmaw iz bizzee wiff Unko Bwiun duhday butt dee weow wite u doon!


San said...

Chuck, u are so welcome!

And dank U for compwementin duh way I peek dwaguneez. I pwactice it with Oakley.

Hug Unko Bwiun and Mawmaw. An hav fun!

Chuck fka: Meanie said...

Hi Mawmawz fwend!

Mee poztud uhbowt mee uhwawd! Dank u doh much foh finkin of mee wen u dav owt deez uhwawdz!

Mee Mawmaw iz bizzee taykin meowz off duh wah, itz uh mezz!


San said...

Meowz off duh wah--dat IZ a mezz!

In Pacifica we had meowz en duh libbin woom en en duh bedwoom. It wuz a mezz wen we took um off duh wahs. But the wahs wuh doh nize widout duh meowz.

Anonymous said...

I feel good! da-da-da-dada-da-da like I knew I would da-da-da-dada-da-da


San said...

Dar, are you taking the microphone and tossing it into your lowered hand, then lifting it back up?

That's when you feel goooooooooooooood.

Oow is right!

Cath said...

Oh my San you are a comedienne too! Thank goodness "kickarse" has no 'r's or 'l's!
I am so glad that you like your award and that you have passed it on to such deserving souls. Especially Alex - I've met him before!

Your description of me too is spot on. How tactful of you not to mention the tw-twitch. Thank you. ;0)

Cath said...

PS Forgot to mention that I love the painting (just read it in comments!) but I do love it honestly - and it is so appropriate for the post.

Cath said...

Oh my San you are a comedienne too! Thank goodness "kickarse" has no 'r's or 'l's!
I am so glad that you like your award and that you have passed it on to such deserving souls. Especially Alex - I've met him before!

Your description of me too is spot on. How tactful of you not to mention the tw-twitch. Thank you. ;0)

Cath said...

Oh my San you are a comedienne too! Thank goodness "kickarse" has no 'r's or 'l's!
I am so glad that you like your award and that you have passed it on to such deserving souls. Especially Alex - I've met him before!

Your description of me too is spot on. How tactful of you not to mention the tw-twitch. Thank you. ;0)

San said...

Cath, you are so right about "kickarse." How convenient.

I'm so glad you enjoyed the post. See, I was nice and didn't bring up the tw-twitch.

And thank you for complimenting my painting.


Lee said...

Wow! San, I'm impressed. You wrote most of that post in another language. My listening/reading vocabulary is better than my expressive one with those dialects. No wonder you practice with Oakley. Is he good with languages too?

Can I ask you to translate for me? Does meowz translate as mirrors? It makes sense but I just wasn't sure. I kept wanting to hear mouse.

Love the painting. Got up close and personal with it. I like the golds and shimmers, especially when they are next to the blues and purple. Do they brand elephants? The painting made me remember Elephant Walk, that 1954 black and white movie. Do you remember it?


SandyCarlson said...

A new language! And what fun. Perhaps Elmer Fudd will be my tutor.

I enjoyed this post so much. Really was a feel-gooder!

Ellie Creek Ellis said...

Well, Well, VERY deserving recipients of such a prestigious award! And congrats to you for figuring out their's cool that you do!

You're a great gal!

murat11 said...

San: My favorite is "dishwag." I like the resonance of that. I must be one, too.

With all these awards, I'm afraid you are going to have to move your "actual" blog to the margins (make it a widget) and move your trophy case front and center.


CoyoteFe said...

You are abswolutely something else. I'd speak your dragon-speak, but I'd sprain mine tongue!

That painting is intriguing. It draws me in. I do not have the gift of art commentary (much to the chagrin of my artist son) so believe me when I say I am praising the painting quite highly!

jsd said...

woof :-)

San said...

Lee--is Oakley good? He taught me coyote and roadrunner!

You're better than you think you are. You translated meowz with impressive fluency.

I always enjoy your thoughtful comments on my paintings, Lee. I don't believe I ever saw Elephant Walk, but one of my most fun memories of childhood is going to the movies at our town's one theater. They used to have a soundtrack they played while the lights were on and everyone was buying their popcorn. It included the Marlboro Man song and yes, Elephant Walk. Were I to compile a playlist, I'd have to include those.

San said...

Sandy, your comments are always "feel-gooders." Thank you.

And I'll admit: the name Elmer Fudd entered my mind a few times as I was writing the post.

San said...

Ellie, you make me blush. I mean bwush.

Have a lovely weekend, my dear...

San said...

Paschal, once we get through next weekend, Indian Market, dishwag will be the word. The downtown shopkeepers will be spent, but we do hope to clean up.

I wook forward to weadin your Sunday Swibble.

Peace (over and) out.

San said...

I believe you, Fe, and I am soaking in that praise. Thank you, kindly.

It feels so good, maybe I'll take a little and put it in a compress for my sprained tongue.


San said...

JS, I see you slipped right into the conversation! PURRRRRRRRR.

Kim said...

Woot woot, this is a hoot!

Blue Sky Dreaming said...

San, I just got a morning tongue and lip workout...thanks, the doctor told me to start exercising! I like the art piece...beautiful texture and color.
Mary Ann

~Babs said...

Tooooo Funny!
I think that language could take some real practice to achieve!

Also LOVE this painting,,,awesome textures and color!

Carol said...

I like your painting, San. It's very warm. And elephanty.

My brain is already short-circuited from trying to take on espanol, but once I'm fluent (ha!) in that, maybe I'll take on a few furry languages like you have so expertly done.

whimsical brainpan said...

Congrats San! I'll have to check out the winners.

Meg Wolff said...

What the heww?? Ha!

Daryl said...

I waz goink to rite phuny end say how much I lafft et ur clevernest butt I duht dew dat so goot


indicaspecies said...

San, yours is not just a 'must see' but a 'must read' blog.:)

Dwagonese ..haha! What talent! Enjoy!

Jeff B said...

Now that's just nutty, carzy, silly! The world could use a bit more of that.

And from one goof ball to another, I thouroughly enjoyed it. Thanks for the chuckle.

Sandi McBride said...

Congwatuwations on your that is really something special. Is it an original by San???? Lovely

david mcmahon said...

G'day from a fewwow bwogger

Celebration of Life said...

Hi San! Sorry that I haven't been by to chat! My house is in chaos and I won't be able to rest until it is back in order. Everyone else seems to think it is "normal" but chaos is stressful for me. I have the mirrors in the diningroom down and the walls painted. I am waiting for the drywall in the kitchen to be completed so I can paint so in the meantime I decided to paint the guest bath. I will need to hire the tiling done; the clock is ticking too fast for us to get it accomplished this weekend. My furniture will be delivered Wednesday but Bry is leaving Tuesday so I am pushing to get everything completed by then.

San said...

Kim, thanks for visiting! It's been a while.

San said...

Thank you, Mary Ann. I moved the paint around with my tongue.

San said...

Babs, thank you for putting up with my silliness. And I'm so glad you like the painting!

San said...

Carol--elephanty--that's the right word!

I didn't know you were learning espanol. If/when you come to Santa Fe, you will be able to pronounce the street names.

San said...

Whim, the "animal" sites are light-hearted and fun. Enjoy...

San said...

Meg, when are you going to put up a macrobiotic critter blog?

San said...

Daryl, you're a natural! I shoulda known.

San said...

Celine, you're back from the travels!

I cannot WAIT to see your photographs and read your stories...

San said...

Jeff, I knew you'd be able to put up with this. You wack job you.

San said...

Danks for duh congwatulations, Sandi!

Yes, that's one of my paintings. I did it a couple of years ago and it wound up living in Iowa City in the home of a school superintendent. Thank you for your wonderful compliment.


San said...

G'day, David. I wuv when you visit.

San said...

Jo, I always feel dismembered during house re-do projects, but I know your place is going to be SO special! It may be just as well you're going to hire a professional on the tile. That is one badass, demanding job.

I hope you're enjoying Bry's company in the midst of the chaos. Hugs.

Indigo said...

Indigo Incarnates

I haven't talked to animals too much (with the exception of my pets, heh heh.) Willow talks to trees, however. :)

Dianne said...

Oh My that was fun to read, and I read it out loud with a really bad dwagonese accent!

thank goodness I was alone

that's an adorable award! very creative - congrats to you and all the others.

lime said...

the cwash couwse in baby dwagonese bwought back memowies of my 11th gwade twigonometwy cwass which was taught by one wussew miward. however, her was neither as cute nor as endearing as your benefactor or award recipients.

Andrea and Kim said...

Yes, it is hard when you have so much talent, but what is to be done about it? You must live with these incredible gifts of yours! AND I DO MEAN YOU HAVE INCREDIBLE GIFTS FOR SO MANY THINGS I AM SURE (clearly you can't share them all with us in blog land). :)

Clearly everyone knows how you deserve this lovely award! Way to go, San...and thanks for sharing the other blogs to explore (and there are some for me to explore).

Velvet Ginger said...

I LOVE that painting!!!!!
That Chuck riding aound with
you-know-who cracks me up, he is easily influenced though and it worries me.
All good bloggers you recognized!
You shoudl add to Bob's resume' that he is a slef proclaimed spy!

Rhea said...

Congrats on your awards and good for you for passing them along. :o)

The Moody Minstrel said...

Ewephants, katz, n' dwagons...yay!!!!

I kan haz award?

Tod said...

Hi San - thanks for visiting my new blog. My God, David Caruso is a dead ringer for Vincent Van Gogh! Astounding. Not what I expected to learn over here, but I'm glad I did. Happy belated B-day too.